I am really struggling :(

Ok, I am not sure if I'm allowed to post this on this messageboard now... but I need some help and support. I havent been able to go more than 2 days on ss without messing up.
I really really want to stick to SS for the next 15 days but i am constantly thinking about food (MOST of them are head cravings) and am worried that i am setting myself up for a binge - so I give in and binge sooner rather than later. (Oh God, I hope I am allowed to post this on this board now it's all so militant now).
I KNOW that if I last for 4 days at the minimum, I will stick to it for the whole 15 days - I am just sabbotaging myself before those 4 days come.
Please please help - should I start a day to day thread here for my accountability and support?
Thanks for listening - I'm sorry if I've overstepped the bounds of this forum

binibikini said:

Ok, I am not sure if I'm allowed to post this on this messageboard now... but I need some help and support. I havent been able to go more than 2 days on ss without messing up.
I really really want to stick to SS for the next 15 days but i am constantly thinking about food (MOST of them are head cravings) and am worried that i am setting myself up for a binge - so I give in and binge sooner rather than later. (Oh God, I hope I am allowed to post this on this board now it's all so militant now).
I KNOW that if I last for 4 days at the minimum, I will stick to it for the whole 15 days - I am just sabbotaging myself before those 4 days come.
Please please help - should I start a day to day thread here for my accountability and support?
Thanks for listening - I'm sorry if I've overstepped the bounds of this forum

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Hey hun, first of all, big hugs!! To even make the decision to start CD at all and take control of your life shows you are strong and determined, you can do this don't worry.

Secondly, everything you said seems well within the new/old rules, so don't worry about that.

OK, well what got me through the first week, was firstly knowing what everyone has reitorated on here millions of times - the first week is the hardest, and then it gets much easier. Everytime I had a low point, I just kept thinking "its just a first week thing, in a few days time it will all be over", and this really helped!
Secondly, the non-head cravings you can get rid of in a few days once you are into ketosis - after that, you don't feel hungry. The only way you can get rid of non-head cravings is not to give in to head cravings

So, what you need to work out is when you have a slip up, why you do it. Is it out of boredom? Is seeing other people eat too tempting? Whatever it is, you need to address it and try and think of ways to avoid it. Try and keep yourself busy, either have a nice bath or watch a film, read a book, honestly once you are immersed in something the hours fly by and you forget you had the cravings - plus feel motivated by the fact you didn't give in!

You also need to remember that the head cravings are just that - in your head. You can control what you pick up, what you eat, you control YOU, and if the head cravings are there, you just need to think "it isn't real", and remind yourself that your mind doesn't control you, you control your own mind I think you are looking at too big a goal - rather than 15 days for now, try splitting it up into four day chunks.

If you have a particular time of day when your head cravings are set off, perhaps tailor your shakes etc so that you can have them then. EG, I find the evenings difficult, so I don't touch anything til 1 o'clock, then not til 5, then I have something to look forward to at 9. Furthermore, you can always split your packs into two, so that you have 6 throughout the day. Remember to keep your water up aswell, sometimes when I feel """hungry""", I drink some water and I'm fine.

If you are really really struggling, have you thought of switching to SS+? The losses are only a pound or 2 less on average than SS, and then you'd have 4 shakes a day plus a meal. Does this sound easier for you?

As for starting a thread, if it will help you then of course you should, I'm sure everyone will support you as much as you can! You can also pop into the Independence Day challenge whenever you want, you don't have to join but feel free to post in there when you're finding things difficult and we'll all do our very best to support you

I'm afraid A-level revision calls now! I'll be back tomorrow and if you need to chat you are more than welcome to p/m me etc.

Chin up xxxxxxx

Thank you so much Luci for writing out such a lovely, thought-out reply. You took time out of your alevel study-time to give me hope and I really really love you for it!
You're right, I really really want to do this, and I think I've identified why I give up:
1. I am moving around a lot during the day (walking, and working out - although I have scaled down on the gym) and during the middle of the day I start 'justifying' to myself that I should be giving my body more energy, and then I think 'ok, so maybe I should have a 4th serving of CD' or healthier still, maybe some veggie juice' and then it just goes downhill from there. i.e. veggie juice turns to salad, etc etc.
I just need to remind myself that CD is a nutritionally balanced diet and that it is not bad for me - also that I might need to really tone down on the gymming while I am on SS.
2. Because I am recovering from an eating disorder (compulsive overeating, binge/purge type behaviour), when I am approaching ketosis, I psyche myself out thinking that I am setting myself up for a bad binge and I worry that ketosis and no-gym will slow my metabolism so much that when I *do* have that binge (as if it is out of my control - which OF COURSE it is not - having a disorder makes you forget that ) my metabolism will be too slow to deal with it and I will (a) be sick (b) gain weight suddenly that I end up 'rationalising' to myself that it;s better to eat 'normally' to lose the weight. This of course is horsepoo because my relationship with food is anything but 'normal' and I KNOW that I need this CD stretch to start from a clean slate, work through those crazy cravings and reform a relationship with food.

It has really helped to write all this out Luci. I really want to thank you for reaching out to me tonight. I want to start meditating again to regain my control - it's an awful feeling when you think that food and binges are something that are 'just going to happen and I cant do anything about it'. I need to remember that this is rubbish and of course I have complete control over what goes into my mouth.

Something I read the other day and I am ready to put it behind me:
"insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result'

A big thank you Luci! BBxx

Oh honey. i'm sorry to hear you're finding it tough. Luci's really said it all so I'll keep this short.

Firsty I want you to know I'm thinking of you. Secondly, if you are still exercising (i know its less than before) you're probably burning up loads of the few calories you're taking in which is why your body is crying out for food. My CDC told me to do 810 because of just this. You'll be suprised how much freedom you have with it. I eat 5 times a day on it. Have a think about that option.

Take care babes xxx

I have been through this so I know how you feel...I still get these 'urges' occasionally but I think the main thing to think of is that no one is forcing you to do this - you have chosen to do it, can choose to continue or can choose to stop at any time!

I felt mentally under pressure to continue and once I had realised that the decision was mine and mine only then it suddenly got easier - sort of a 'challenge' to myself that I could stay strong and beat those demons!!

Although I am half way to my target I have been off plan due to illness so in effect yesterday was my first day at 100% again and I have been going through the same feelings again - even though I have lost almost 3 stone I am still doubting if it will continue to work!

Have a quiet moment, think about why you want to do this, realise that you are the one in control and reassure yourself that at any time you can stop the diet and choose to eat - knowing you can do that if you want to is half the mental battle of not binging.

Hope this helps

Just imagine ourself thin.. Those first few days are hard and extreme but once you've got passed them, you'll find that a loss of weight will encourage you to carry on. Don't forget that you'll be loosing lb's as well as fat.. I have lost 7 inches around my waiste and 3 from my bust in 3 weeks. 12 lb.s in total now and..last week was my lowest loss of a lb, but I had been ill and the TOTM. Find yourself a good thread to join and get your support from there on a day to day basis. If I had not had my support on here, I would have fallen off and it was with that support that I got through those difficult times. You can do it because you deserve to! Good luck. xx

Aw I hope you over come the head battle, its crazy isnt it I suffer from it and just think each time you beat out, you have become more stronger, when I get *the voice* I go to bed and pamper myself.

I think of this way one slip takes what three/four days to get back and thats three days of not losing and then you torture yourself.

I did it when I tried to do it last year, before I knew about this place, everytime was harder to get back in the end I jacked it in, God how thin I would be now if I had stuck to it, but back on it and loving it, so if your finding it hard talk and talk and talk and ignore the head.

Good luck with it, I really hope you can over come it, and come chat to us in ButtERfly thread is ever going your always welcome xx

Hey hon ..
Just wanted to send you big hugs.. You can do it you can do it.....
I recently changed to ss+ after 13 weeks on ss..... and it really feels different if you are desperate for food dont beat yourself up just change to a different plan. Your not cheating your just changing plans. I still lost weight both weeks that I have done ss+ have a think about it, it may be your answer.
Chin up your doing fab x

Thank you so much guys for all your responses (just woke up over here for work and came online first thing
You all are proof that it CAN be done and like many of you have said: it is my decision and mine only and I love the internal voice of 'I want to do this - no one's making me'. I really want today to be different even though I am already getting the beginnings of 'the voices' (lol @witchy I get them too, the dirty b*st*rds ) but I'll be damned if I don't do this for myself for the next 15 days. It's the perfect stretch of time for me - I only have major social commitments further on during the weekend so by that time I will be nicely settled into my routine.
I would only feel comfortable switching to SS+ once I've had the SS clean slate for 15 days. I can imagine myself a skinny-minnie on my beach holiday in September and XMas in NY as a 120lb woman
Thank you all so much for your words of support!!!
xx

binibikini said:

Thank you so much guys for all your responses (just woke up over here for work and came online first thing
You all are proof that it CAN be done and like many of you have said: it is my decision and mine only and I love the internal voice of 'I want to do this - no one's making me'. I really want today to be different even though I am already getting the beginnings of 'the voices' (lol @witchy I get them too, the dirty b*st*rds ) but I'll be damned if I don't do this for myself for the next 15 days. It's the perfect stretch of time for me - I only have major social commitments further on during the weekend so by that time I will be nicely settled into my routine.
I would only feel comfortable switching to SS+ once I've had the SS clean slate for 15 days. I can imagine myself a skinny-minnie on my beach holiday in September and XMas in NY as a 120lb woman
Thank you all so much for your words of support!!!
xx

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HEHE I know

You will do great, good luck chick x

Hi there Bikinibabe
We've all experienced these same problems and everything has been said to encourage you to keep it up and get past those first 4 days.
I started on SS+ until I lost a stone then started on SS which for me made it easier.
You will get there and everyone on this site is so supportive you will succeed.
Good luck with your journey and I look forward to seeing your progress over the coming weeks.
Take care and feel good about yourself - you're so worth it!
xx