Original Coping when your life and house is upside down!

Cherryade

Full Member
We found out yesterday that my step dads cancer has returned and its bad this time, very bad. Its in his brain, all number of soft tissues and of course he and my mum are devestated. As are the rest of us.

Id already taken the week off to paint my house and its upside down - totally. The food cupboards are spread all over the kitchen and its just about possible to make a small space to make a meal.

With both of these unsettling things its making me feel like a) comfort eating b) my routine is all gone so....

I dont think Im going to have a loss this week as I had my weekend off (and learnt that I dont like going off plan!) and despite being back on plan Im not 100%.

Im trying starting from now, having just had a SW bacon sarni as I wont get to eat again for a long time as once I get painting I wanna get it done! So its exercising I guess, I painted for four 5 hours solid yesterday but then after I over synned on crisps (which I dont even like much) but I was just eating for the sake of trying to fill the hole that the news had left.

I have to stay on track! Thanks for reading, right Im off to paint!
 
sorry to hear the news about your step dad. i lost my step dad to lung cancer in 2002.x
 
My thoughts are with you. You're probably doing a good thing though, but keeping yourself so busy. Might help keep you from dwelling on things. There are some things that no matter how terrible they are, there's not much you can do to change them. You will find your peace within it all soon. Until then... (((( hugs ))))
 
Sorry to hear your sad news.

Unfortunately news like this often throws us off plan and we start to think that there are more important things in life to worry about than a bit of excess weight...which in a way, is true. But remember who you are doing this for....and how you felt at the weekend after over- indulging.
In regards to your painting and eating today....why not make something now that you can just scoff a bit later when you stop for a break? I find if I go without food and get too hungry, its then that I reach for all the wrong things, usually in desperation, only to feel bad about it afterwards.
Remember, food doesn't make us feel better and doesn't ease the pain in any situation. I hope this doesn't sound too harsh in the circumstances, its just something that I have learned....the hard way unfortunately.
Thoughts are with you.
 
So sorry to hear about your dad. You're in my thoughts xx
 
Thanks everyone :) you guys are the best xx

I agree re getting too hungry and then reaching for anything, so have taken your advice and made up a big pot of my favourite free salad with lots of cottage cheese and ham etc - and am having a good tuck in while Im having a break, so ty and I didnt think what you said was harsh at all, just v true.

Keeping busy is helping and I am kinda trying to think through it all, its alot to take in, esp as we only lost my uncle (mums bro and step dads best mate) a few years ago and he suffered terribly at the end, I just dont want him to suffer and have pain, its so so sad, hes been more of a dad to me than my 'real' dad whose v flighty and hes looked after my mum and that worries me too, what will she do without him, I worry about her ultimatley being on her own. My head is just full of these kinda thoughts.

Thanks again, it does seem paltry worrying about my weight at a time like this but I need to stick to my plan as it makes me feel so much better, all round.
 
Hi Cherryade. Nothing I can add to what has been said already, but I wanted to say I am thinking of you x
 
My thoughts are with you too!
 
Im so sorry to hear about your step dad. My thoughts are with you.
Coming on here and getting a bit of extra support will hopefully be a great help to you, at least you know there are always plenty of people on here you can speak to - the people already replying to this thread shows that.

Im afraid im away to put my professional hat on now though - there are plenty of places that you and your family can all speak to regarding your step dads health if you ever felt that was needed. They are all fantastic and are just there to listen and help you all deal with the news. Im unsure if you have been told about different services or not but if you would like some more information, just send me a message and I can send you some details. (Sorry, I volunteer in Doctors surgeries and signpost to services and groups which can improve patients health and well-being).

Professional hat back off so that I can send you a big hug!!!!! x x
 
Thanks again lovelies. Victoria I will take you up on your offer, thankyou my mum could definatley do with people to talk to about it all.

Thanks again to you great folks, Ive just got through day 1 back on plan 100% :) it really is good to talk!!
 
Hi Cherryade,

I'm very sorry to hear about your Stepdad. I can truly say I know what you are going through!

On 4 July 2007 I lost my 22 year old little brother to a brain tumour, his too was secondary. It was an awful time and it was the aftermath of losing Andy that made me comfort eat and put on weight again! Hopefully it will not turn out like this for you and your family hun!

My thought and wishes are with you. If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to PM me, cos I know what your going through and how sometimes it helps to escape to someone outwith the circle for a shoulder to cry on.

Sending you huge hugs hun! Stay positive, it's amazing what positivity can do!

K xx
 
Hi Cherryade,

I'm very sorry to hear about your Stepdad. I can truly say I know what you are going through!

On 4 July 2007 I lost my 22 year old little brother to a brain tumour, his too was secondary. It was an awful time and it was the aftermath of losing Andy that made me comfort eat and put on weight again! Hopefully it will not turn out like this for you and your family hun!

My thought and wishes are with you. If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to PM me, cos I know what your going through and how sometimes it helps to escape to someone outwith the circle for a shoulder to cry on.

Sending you huge hugs hun! Stay positive, it's amazing what positivity can do!

K xx

Im so sorry to read this K. That is so tragic, so young :( heartbreaking.

I may just do that and drop you a PM, thankyou, its hard to know how to deal with this and what to say to him and my mum now and when it gets tougher, its just so bewildering atm.

Thanks again to you all xx
 
Im so sorry to read this K. That is so tragic, so young :( heartbreaking.

I may just do that and drop you a PM, thankyou, its hard to know how to deal with this and what to say to him and my mum now and when it gets tougher, its just so bewildering atm.

Thanks again to you all xx


Feel free anytime hun :D

K xx
 
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