Hello - You have a customer - my wings are getting weak

ladylite

Gold Member
Well I havnt hit the floor yet and hoping that befoe I hit the ground those old wings will start flappy hard again and get me back up there with my halo.

I will cut and paste what I put in my blog. Any comments or tips would be grately appreciatex. It is nice to be in a place where everyone isnt perfect for a while "if you know what I mean". You feel you dont wanna keep bringing too much gloom to your happy LL thread. Well here goes.

Well here we are done my 100 days and lost 3st 3lbs. Look and feel amazing to what I did b4 I started, but in reality I still have 5 stone to lose to get to a good BMI.

So what the bloody hell am I doing. Why can I not finish one thing in my life. Now I am mucking around and yesterday did the biggest sabotage ever, its like deliberate.

Do I want to be slim, perhaps I dont. But I do, so what is the big voice in my head that is stopping me. I need to get in touch with this voice, but I cant seem reach it. I can see it, I can hear it and sometimes I feel like I can touch it. But for the life of my I cannot get it to listen. It can be very arrogant, even deceitful and it takes over me.

Perhaps I have got to try and work with it and not against it. Come to terms with it. It is my addiction and I need to treat it with respect, listen to it, try and work with it and not against it all the time. Perhaps I am not listening to IT.

I just dont know. I only seem to write a blog when things are going wrong. Perhaps I should write things down when the are going right.

Right lets do this 8 hours by 8hours. I say this as I can be good until the evening and then the old voice kicks in. So for the first 8 hours I will be brilliant, I know I can do that bit it is easy. Its the 2nd 8 hours when everything starts.

I will right a note on the calendar to tell Me to beware as the old demon voice will be calling me and I need to talk to it and not work against it. Try and find out what it is trying to tell me.
I CAN DO THIS. I AM GONNA DO THIS. I BLOODY MEAN IT. I WILL NOT GIVE IN.

So at 4ish I will re visit my blog and I will write down what I am feeling. Before I do any cheating, sabotaging or whatever you wanna call it, I am going to write on here why, what it will feel like during, how long will that feeling last and what will I feel like after.

Cause bloody hell, I feel like **** now after yesterday, tearful etc etc.

Now come positvie thinking cap on.

I AM GONNA DO THIS and the next 8 hours will be easy and I am coming on here and writing down why before anything illegal goes into my mouth.
 
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Hi lovely Ladylite

I think you have sorted this out all on your own:) You've come up with a plan and it seemed to me as I read this post that as you typed things started to become clearer to you.

I can fully empathise with you on this one, and probably most of us on Minimins. We get in the flow of the diet and we feel in control, which is a most powerful feeling. I think this gaining control feeling takes a fair few weeks to kick in. At the start of the diet we are excited and a little apprehensive, worrying about can we manage to live without our lifelong friend/enemy. After the first month we know we can, and our self esteem lifts and we feel for once that yes there is a strong possibility that our dreams of slimdon are in sight.

You have just reached a milestone in your journey and perhaps this has caused you to have a bit of a wobble, and this is scarey stuff because once again we feel we aren't in control anymore. But just as quickly as this wobble has happened it can stop. I think your plan of writing every feeling down in your blog is a good one, expressing how you feel by writing it all down is a great way to gain back that control. I know if I feel bad about something and I write it all down and then sit back and reread it it helps me just to release those thoughts that build up in your head.

I probably have wittered on here and not helped very much, but I wish you all the best and know you can get over this blip and back on track. Once you have you will feel wonderful, it will reinforce the fact that you can take control at any time, even when things seem extremely tough, this will be a good experience for when you reach goal (and you will) as you'll know that you will be able to face those food addictions and maintain.

I think we need these tests now and again, it makes us stronger in the long run and makes us realise and appreciate the journey we've had. If everything went too easily and we got to goal without any problems, maintenance would be even more of a shock to the system.

Have a great day, you'll turn this around.

Tracey
x
 
Hi Tracey,

Thank you for you post it made LOADS of sense to me and seemed really true.

I like the way you explained that it will be a good exercise for RTM which is quite true.

Thanks again and I think I will use this part of the forum more often. I dont like to keep wittering on about how bad I can be on our LL thread as they are allll so positive, not that I think they will mind.

It is also to get extra opinions from other people.

FANKYOU.
 
Hi Tracey,


Thanks again and I think I will use this part of the forum more often. I dont like to keep wittering on about how bad I can be on our LL thread as they are allll so positive, not that I think they will mind.

I know what you mean, you feel kind of guilty posting something negative in case it makes others feel negative too! Especially as people who are new to the diet are reading the posts. There are some great people on the LL forum, I love reading their posts, I don't always comment being a CDer and all that;) There is a great network of encouragement and words of wisdom between you all.

It is also to get extra opinions from other people.

FANKYOU.

You're more than welcome:):):):)

Tracey
x
 
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