I've had a sodding 'nuff

luckyloser

Hate it but doing it!
I've had enough, i'm sick to death of constantly thinking and craving food. I'm miserable, i'm making my husband miserable i just don't think i can keep with it. I'm only a third of the way through for chuffing nora. Sod the adult/child/parent mentality i just can't put my life on hold for the sake of losing some more weight. I've done well so far, so well i've been feeling guilty at the snide comments at the session that quite frankly make me feel bad. I would actually hurt someone in order to have something to eat. I've even gone to the Supermarket and the back of my car is full of crisps that i've not yet opened but it's almost a bit of a comfort that they are there if it gets too much. Hubster has been ok, gave me a really nice card with a heart felt, "you're doing so well, think of laying on the beach when this is over". But to be honest is this ever really over. I can't help but think i'll go back to eating volume when i can because that's what i've always done which, i begrudge to admit, made me so overweight in the first place. I know i'm being selfish, a negative sod who's thinking about this too much and i should just pull myself together but i am thoroughly sodding miserable. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, sorry xxx
 
Who hoo there.

Take a deep breath you sound so angry and I do know how you must feel.

But dont give up, as hubby said you have done so well. You can do this you are only having a little mind blip, which I am sure will happen to all of us.

Please dont give up as you know you will regret it. Stay strong and hold in there honey.

I am sending you bigs hugs and positive vibes.

:hug99::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes:
 
Do you wanna go into the chat room and let off some more steam?
 
Hi Ladylite, not been before but i'll give it a go, meet you there!
 
Hi Wobbly - well I do hope you're feeling a bit better now. To be honest I think you've got to look at whether you feel this way most of the time or whether this is just a 'moment' ---- if it's most of the time then maybe you might be better trying somehting else such as WW as it can't be healthy feeling so stressed ..... but if this is just a 'moment' (and I really do hope it is) then accept it as that, stamp and shriek and let it all out .... and just keep on thinking that at least you'll feel better tomorrow AND be at least a stone lighter in 4 weeks .... that's what does it for me.

((((hugs))))
 
Wobbly, hang on in there! Move the goal posts. I see from your ticker that you have quite a low BMI target. Make a smaller interim goal and aim for that. It seems such a far and hard step otherwise, and you can achieve a nearer goal and then move the goal posts! I've been looking out for you since you posted about needing help for your tail end, so I hope that got sorted! We are here for you.
 
I'm sorry you're having such a rotten time hun. :patback:

I think this all depends about what you want MORE. Do you want to be slim? Or do you want to eat? It's your choice and you're not being forced to do this diet, it's up to you.

The fact you are finding it so difficult now, and you're NOT feeling physical hunger (if you're in ketosis and not cheating) proves that you have a real problem with emotional hunger, meaning this diet is probably the right one for you so you can confront those issues.

You need other ways to spoil yourself. Buy yourself some clothes that previously wouldn't have fit to give yourself a boost. Dig around in your wardrobe for things that have been too tight, and try them on again.

Go to the cinema, get a DVD out, have a warm relaxing bath. Go and get a manicure or a facial (or both!) Have your hair done, buy some new make up.

Do stuff like that which will make you feel GOOD about yourself, and when you can look at yourself and see how good you look, and take more pride in your appearance (I think we all go through a 'why bother?' stage when we're bigger) and you will feel a bit happier, and if you're happier more able to cope.

You should feel proud of yourself for abstaining as long as you have! It clearly hastn' been easy for you and doesn't that show how much will power you have? You are incredibly strong. You CAN do this, you HAVE done this!

Find whatever it is (that isn't food!) that makes you happy and relaxed, and do it as much as you can.

Don't forget to vent on here whenever you need to. We've all been there (and I'm only 3 weeks in!)

Take care of yourself xxxx :grouphugg:
 
Aww Wobbly, you have had a rough time the last few days. I hope you are feeling brighter today, and have a clear mind on what you want to do. Do let us know how you are getting on. We are all here for support, no matter waht you are going through or what you choose to do.

XXX
 
Hi ladies, thanks for all your messages.
I really mean it when i say that but despite all of this i still don't feel much better. I had a chat with the ladies yesterday in the chat room which really helped but to be honest as soon as i logged off i had to go to bed so that i didn't have to think about food. I've been doing that a lot lately to avoid food, i've had so many early nights it's ridiculous.
Hubster doesn't want me to give up and i think deep down i know that if i do i'll regret it and be disappointed in myself but i can't keep feeling like this for the next 2 months i really can't.
I've been considering doing the Atkins diet, i love carbs, oooh, lush, but i know that i'll find it easier to cut out those completely than i have been able to cut out food completely. Hubster's not convinced of the Atkins and the affect it can/may have on health but i've stopped listening to him now.
I hope to god this is a "moment", but it's been going on for nearly a week now. Last weekend i felt like death warmed up and the issues i was having then still haven't been resolved.
I've been through counselling in the past over varying issues but i've never been able to get to the bottom of why i eat volume and i seriously doubt that i'll be able to do that in the sessions we have each week.
I really thought i had the willpower, 3 months for naffs sake that's all i had to do.
Bugger it
 
Hey Wobbly

I am wondering what you meant about snide comments in group in your original post? I wonder if thats why you are so fed up with it?

Sorry you feel like that anyway- if the feeling persists maybe you should try Atkins for a while.... I lost 3 stone on it in 5 months, eating LOADS and drinking LOADS as well I have to confess:eek: - reading that thread on dangers of ketosis, its a wonder I didnt end up in hospital or something!!:eek:

Like any diet though - as we all know to our cost, if you dont work on maintenance you put it back on - which I did, when I went back to carbs, having got to the stage where the very mention of chicken breast or mayo made me want to heave! It took a year to regain it. In retrospect, if I had moved on to a low GI plan it would probably have been ok....

If you like "volume" how about trying a vegetarian diet? Or is it only volume carbs that will do? If thats the case Atkins might be best as it would allow you to avoid "trigger foods"? I don't know - its difficult isnt it.... sorry I can't really be any help but good luck to you anyway.
 
Sorry to hear you're struggling...good luck with whatever you decide.
 
Hi ladies,
i've been trying to think why i'm off loading here and i think it's because i'm asking for permission to start eating again, how bad is that.
Massive hugs to you too Miss Fenella, it's not fun and i hope that you are able to work through it, i just don't think that i'm strong enough at the mo.
People keep saying to me, "ooh, look at you you're getting a figure again" but i genuinely can't see it, warped or what. I still have my double chin, fat thighs, back fat, wobbly arms, how can i be getting smaller but not be seeing it?
I don't think the group situation is helping either Mrs Pink, when the counsellor has sat down with us and asked how people are getting on on at least 3 occasions i can think of different people have said, "well i did think i was doing well but some of us here have lost more than 2 stone", and they've said it with such a look on their face that i retreat. I sit on the sofa, grab the cushion and hide behind it because i feel guilty. I'm at least 10 years younger than most of the ladies there and i exercise so perhaps it's only normal that i would lose it a little bit faster but it will slow down for me and they'll catch up. Urgh.
I definately a carnivore so a veggie diet just wouldn't cut the mustard for me, i adore carbs but i've read so much about them and the impact that they have on the body i've made a conscious decision that i will limit my intake of them. For maintenance whenever i get down to my weight i will operate the 80/20% rule. Monday to Friday i will eat a brilliantly healthy diet and at the weekend i will have what i want, (and no, it won't include bingeing), within reason and that may include a baked spud every now and again. Doing this i won't feel that i'm depriving myself of anything which immediately sends me to the fridge in a panic.
Oh well, time for bed. Night ladies. Thanks for taking the time to reply
x
 
i think no matter how what way you choose to lose weight, we all have these moments.
It's hard to stay positive all the time, and it's hard not to wish we could just eat whatever we wanted and not gain weight.
I think letting off some steam and keep getting it off your chest is the best way of handling it, dont hold back on how youre feeling, thats the beauty of sites like this, you can type it all out - even if it goes on for a week at a time, there will come a more positive time again when you know it is all worth it.
Your husband sounds great, and the card from him was lovely - its showing that he isnt getting sick of it, but he knows how frustrated you are getting and he wants you to remember the bigger picture, for you.

I've had alot of struggles with myself and i've been at this a long time, I'm glad I didnt give up and just took lots of breaks instead, maybe that approach would suit you? Have some weeks of losing then practice maintaining?
Anyway, hope you have your positive time soon, you've done really well and should be proud - 31lb is alot of extra weight you no longer carry about so it cant all be bad?
just another few pound and you will be out of the obese bmi range, maybe aim for that then have a wee maintaining time to get your head round it all?
 
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