**Seren's Diary**

Right, I've decided I'm going to write a diary on here (even if noone but me ever reads it!) just to keep myself in check. It's all been going well so far but I can almost feel that this is make or break point.

I've got back into my size 14 jeans, almost everyone I meet says "wow, haven't you lost weight" and I actually feel pretty good. It'd be too easy to lose motivation at this stage.

Not so much with the food because, honestly, that hasn't been that hard. I've tried this weight loss thing so many times before that I have a crazy amount of knowledge about low fat alternatives for food and snacks. But definately with exercise and not being able to motivate myself to the gym.

I work full time as a trainee solicitor so I'm usually pretty exhausted after a full day/week in the office and the last thing I feel like doing is heading to the gym!

BUT I am going to go straight from work tonight and mix it up a bit so rather than slogging it out on the treadmill I'm going to do 10-15 mins on four different machines and some free weights.

WW chicken curry and a Tesco light choices naan with peas for my tea. No dessert. As it's friday there will be a few glasses of wine later but a run tomorrow to make up for it.

My aim is to get into a (small) size 12 skirt that I bought. I intend to be wearing it on my 27th birthday next year. I'll never be skinny and, honestly, I looked daft for the oh 5 minutes I was at age 18. But I would like to be healthy and slim and confiedent again.

So that's it in a nutshell. Weigh day is Tuesday and my next Dr's weigh in is 5 December.

Well one thing I can assure is that we ALL read diaries lol!

I think you are doing so well & please please don't give up now, we are all here to give you a virtual kick up the arse if required. I have done the same as you & when I managed to squeeze in to a big 18 just before my wedding I thought that would do & stopped dieting & ended up bigger than ever & had to buy a size 26 jeans in the summer:cry:

Keep going & think how amazing that skirt will look xx

Hi, I'll pop in and see how you're doing if that's ok? I love the idea of incentive clothes (mine is my Xmas dress lol) it's something I've done since the beginning & find it really helps even if the scales aren't always kind

Good luck & congrats on being committed to going to the gym! Exercise is definitely where I lose focus lol X

My incentive is at each 5kg lost a date night with OH of MY choice.. No kids..

See I love the date night idea x

Thank you for your replies. Problem I have with OH is that he swears blind he cannot see why I am doing this. Now, this may be because OH is not a small bloke himself ( I prefer my men more Meat Loaf than Raw Meat) or just because he actually thinks I am the most lovely thing to ever walk the earth (his words) but he needs to help me celebrate my success with this and support my journey. He always says "well you always look beautiful to me" which is lovely but sometimes I need that validation to say it working!

Anyway, tonight I went to a fireworks party. I did go to the gym after work. Treadmill, x-trainer and weights. I was late to the party so avoided the usual takeaway order. Wine has been taken but you've gotta have something! Running tomorrow. Gonna try 8kmph for 30 mins and see how far I can run.

Had the family on healthy tonight (WW sausages, peppers and onions baked, sweet potato mash and a fresh fruit salad) and very tasty too. Mr Seren and I had a wee set too because he has a family history of heart issues and he isnt a small guy. I LOVE him as he IS but being realistic and hopefully kids in a few years, he should be looking to lose weight. He took it badly and I get that, I would too, but gotta hope something sank in. No gym tomorrow as we're off to see Evanescence. Amy Lee in a corset should be about 6 months gym motivation.

Bad Seren. Weighed myself early and shows 2lb loss. I'm aiming for 2lb a week so that's great but now if it isnt that come "official" WI day I'll be gutted. I really should hide the scales.

I'm having a hungry day today. Watching the clock tick until it is 11am and therefore snack time.

I actually feel quite sad that I can't go to the gym tonight. The concert will be amazing but going to the gym always makers me feel like I am doing something positive towards weight loss rather than just waiting for it to happen. Maybe the only reason I feel like this is because I know I don't have to go! If I wasnt going out I'm sure I would have a million excuses.

Totally forgot my Asda Good For You ready meal though so I'm going to have to nip out at lunch time and hunt down something for tea that I can zap before I leave work. Otherwise I'll find myself in Burger King.

SerenRock said:

No gym tomorrow as we're off to see Evanescence. Amy Lee in a corset should be about 6 months gym motivation.

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So jealous! And definitely agree... That is motivation

I'm so excited! It's the OH's revenge as well for the many, many gigs we have gone to where I drool over lead guitarists and frontmen. It's his turn to drool this evening.

Normal tradition dictates that there is BK and beer on gig nights so I don't think he's too impressed with my eating at work before I meet him. I've just bought myself a WW chicken curry from the corner shop to avoid temptation.

SerenRock said:

I'm so excited! It's the OH's revenge as well for the many, many gigs we have gone to where I drool over lead guitarists and frontmen. It's his turn to drool this evening.

Normal tradition dictates that there is BK and beer on gig nights so I don't think he's too impressed with my eating at work before I meet him. I've just bought myself a WW chicken curry from the corner shop to avoid temptation.

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congrats on the willpower, um I could so eat a BK right now (sorry that isnt helping lol) I have to agree there are plenty of musicians worth an ogle... whose your top 3? hope you have an awesome time x x

Evanescence were amazing! No corset for Amy...full on cat suit with a skirt thingy. Mr Seren was suitably impressed. No BK was eaten but a did have a couple of beers. She is stunning and so talented. Makes me miss my long black hair and definately adds some willpower to tomorrow's gym session!!

Musicians...right now (and it changes a lot!) my top 3 are Zakk Wylde (Black Label Society), Miles Kennedy (Alter Bridge/Slash) and Doug Aldrich (Whitesnake). How bout you? xx

Brrr! Cold this morning. First things first - 2lb off! I have worked out through trial and error that if I have anything to drink the night before then I weigh in at 2lb less than my actual weight. Dehydration and all that. So the scales show 4lb off but I'm sticking with 2lb.

I'll check again tomorrow and who knows, might be pleasantly surprised. Good job I weigh myself 3 times tho to check. First time I got on it said 7lbs off. Yeah right!

Very tired today and forgot my lunch. I'm been and bought a Go Ahead snack for 11am to stop me reaching for the crisps and will go to Boots for a Shapers meal. In the meantime, I've have weetabix and am now gulping diet coke for the caffeine.

Gym tonight (if I don't fall asleep!) as well.

I looked at a couple of pics from last night and it's time to throw out my black velvet top. It looks huge. This is a good thing but I love that top!

Just testing to see if I now have a ticker thingy....

....Yay!

SerenRock said:

Musicians...right now (and it changes a lot!) my top 3 are Zakk Wylde (Black Label Society), Miles Kennedy (Alter Bridge/Slash) and Doug Aldrich (Whitesnake). How bout you? xx

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I have narrowed it down to 4 (& another which is a long standing but pretty uncool crush lol) so:
1. Brian Molko (placebo)
2. Chester Bennington (linkin park)
3. Billie Joe Armstrong (green day) yum!!
4. Dryden Mitchell (alien ant farm)

And the very uncool but gorgeous Mark Feehily (westlife) - goin to farewell concert in April and am soooo excited!

Brian Molko! Well there's a name I havent heard in a while. I used to really love Placebo but not really listened to them much in the last few years. I wouldn't worry re Mark from Westlife: My guilty secret crush has always been Lee Brennan from 911. I loved that band! My sister saw them play a 90s weekend at Butlins. SO jealous.

SerenRock said:

Brian Molko! Well there's a name I havent heard in a while. I used to really love Placebo but not really listened to them much in the last few years. I wouldn't worry re Mark from Westlife: My guilty secret crush has always been Lee Brennan from 911. I loved that band! My sister saw them play a 90s weekend at Butlins. SO jealous.

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Lol, I love placebo! More there older stuff though X

Well done Seren you're doing really well!!!!

Re music, I now feel I need to admit my guilty pleasure is the one & only Mr Donnie Wahlberg from New Kids On The Block who I'm going to see in April lol

Lol it's like 'dodgy crushes anonymous'

Yay for guilty crushes anon! I've re-checked my weight just now since its been a few hours since I ate so it should match my morning weight. And it does! 2lb off. Woohoo!

Looking forward to zumba tomorrow night and then trying out a new gym near work Thurs/Fri/Sat as its cheaper and more convenient. No pool though but for half the price. Just hoping its not too mad busy with everyone in all the offices around going at lunch/after work.

After tonight I am also going to try and cut out the wine. I've cut down a lot since starting xenical as I was wanting to really do this but there are still too many "crap day, cant eat, will have wine and tv time". Not going to quit drinking full stop but limit it to planned nights out every so often and start driving to places to avoid temptation!

Seren xx