The rambling thoughts of a slimming worlder

Ive never been drawn in by the whole " psycology" of why i am fat. there is one plain and simple reason... i eat too much of the wrong foods and i dont exercise.
I am 36 yrs old and ive never seemed to be able to control myself and sustain it.
I looked at my 7 yr old daughter this morning and marvelled at her beautiful figure, just right for a child of her age. Then i realised there is a phsycological reason and it stems back to when my mother was growing up. She was 1 of 7 children looked after by a stepmother who disliked children and didnt feed them amongst other things ( but thats a different story) in this day and age my mum probably would of been accused of being anorexic she was so skinny. When i was growing up my mum loved that i had a good appitite, and our plates were always piled high with puddings to follow and there was never a shortage of food in the cupboards. I was always chunkie then id sprout up, get chunkie and sprout up then i got chunkie and stopped sprouting. It never bothered me, why would it all adults told me it was puppy fat and it would soon drop off but it never did. I slimmed right down for my wedding in 2000 and was a slinkey size 10 and loved it, I gained weight again then slimmed down for a holiday, gained weight and then slimmed down when we decided to start a family. I was only ever about 1 to 1 1/2 stone over weight but when i became pregnant it all went abit pear shaped, if there was ever a time to have an excuse for eating this was it. Today i am 3 stone over weight, and for my height of 3 foot 4" you can definately tell.
My children are like me they have good appitites but i do watch what they eat, they dont get the junk that i had and their portions are suited to that of a childs, so the question is why cant i seem to do the same for myself?
I have 3 insentives that has put me back in the right frame of mind to start my weight loss journey again firstly we have booked a holiday for september next year, and i want to enjoy it and not feel uncomfortable in my summer clothes.
I dont want to be fat and 40 so once lost i will sustain it.
3rdly in my group the mother of a little girl who has in the past bullied my daughter at school has joined my group, we are not friends but i dont dislike her either, but it has seemed to put my nose out of joint alittle ( this feeling has surprised me ) its made me feel quite competitive, i feel i wont be out done by her, so the heat is on, i am in the zone, and ready to roll.
My aim is to loose 1 lb per week for 12 months, im in for the long haul, and 1lb per week is totally atchievable. Over this period of time it should change the way i eat for the better for ever, im looking forward to getting back into my clothes hanging in the wardrobe just waiting to be worn, and a little more energy through the day would be good too!!

I was talking to a friend today, she has never had a weight problem as such, but i suppose she's been trying to loose about 9 - 10 lbs for a while.
she has tried shakes, and has also tried SW but with out success the reason being she never follows the plan, skips meals etc.
Well i told her that my plan was to loose 1lb per week, and she stated "my god if i am going to put myself through all that deprivation and starving myself id want to loose at least 3 - 4 lb per week i cant be bothered with that"
She didnt mean it nasty, but when ive lost a few pounds, enough so that people start noticing, i shall remind her what she said and show her that i didnt actually starv myself at all.
my be it will be the boost she needs to start eating properly.

Today is the start of my danger zone.
But i am very proud of myself today ive stuck to my food plan and ive only got 2 days to get myself through.
Ive got to find a way to get myself through the weekend staying on track and not falling off the wagon, i dont want my good efforts of the week to go to waste

The reason why the weekend is a danger zone for me is because saturday is my most unorganised day, i work and i have to sort the children out too and when ive finished work i have to pick them up, last minute hubbie will say " fancy a takeaway" mind you we havent done that for a while we are so skint.
Sunday we go the inlaws, they are vegi and mum inlaw is the most amazing cook, thankfully she has also done slimming world so she always makes sure my dinner is virtually syn free, but she loves making puddings and generally there is at least 3 - 4 puddings sat on the side just calling out my name. suryp sponge dripping with golden suryp and home made custard.. oh....my....god... how can i resist that??? I did phone her last night and asked if she could not make it this week, maybe make something covered in cream, i think shes going to make something like lemon gataux, I hate cream so that will be no temptation for me at all, i just hope she can resist temptation to make several puddings just incase i change my mind and want some.
If she does do that i think i will take the dogs for a walk while they all tuck into pudding, im sure they wont want me drooling over every spoon full they shovel into their mushes:sigh:
Any way i have got through the first day of my danger zone reletively unscathed, ive only got to get through tomorrow and its weigh in on monday.
I dont have scales at home to give me an idea of how i am doing so weigh in is a total suprise, god i hope ive lost this week, its the same old though ... i know ive stuck to plan... but ive eaten so much it feels as if ive been naughty.. Roll on monday