I am possessed.

Daydreambeliever

Full Member
Please excuse the following long rambles-I feel like I've made an important psychological discovery about myself. One which probably everyone has made about themselves-but bear with me-if you dare!!
I am on day 6. 100% ss-yay me-the weekend was tough because of the lack of work routine, but I got there. What surprised me was the fact I dreamt, vividly about food all 3 nights; and seemed to have a permanent voice in my head saying "just eat, just eat". SERIOUSLY- it was constant...I made myself sit still yesterday, and allowed myself to realise its a part of me-and not a scary extra voice(!)-and it is going to take ALOT of work to suppress that 'voice'. So I've named her-she is the Fat Monster who Lives Within, and she will keep nagging-loudly sometimes,not so much at others...I don't know if I even want to weigh myself tomorrow, because for me, now, the most important battle is recognising why I eat,what has made it so important that I have a 'monster', and living fearlessly and strongly without food being my crutch.
Thank you. Self analysis over-whoever has read this far-well done!!!!!!! Something less dreary next time! ddb xx
 
Hey,

I have been thinking along the same lines as you recently - first day on SS+ today but been analysing for a while!

WHY am i so obsessed with food?
WHY do i continuously choose to eat crap then feel like crap afterwards etc etc!
I am sure you know where i am coming from!

When i do SS+ i can actually smell chinese! :-/

Anyway just to really say i understand!
:) xx
 
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