thisisit120lbs
Full Member
Hi All,
I've been procarastinating whether to do this diet for that last 5/6 years...and each time I start, I am good for the most 5 weeks and then I go back to my old ways of eating...I have said in the past, I want to look good for this holiday, that event, my brothers wedding, blah blah, but all the events have come and gone and here I am, STILL FAT, and feeling crap!!! :cry:
Honestly there have been days where I hate myself and looking in the mirror is really painful as I have this disgusted image which only I can see and no matter how hard I've tried to be positive, I can't...I find it hard to socialise as I have been fairly big since I've been a little girl and been around alot of discouraging people who have always said you have no will power and your never going to find a man being that size! (That includes my mum). I've had a few relationships but the men I have been with always run off and cheat on me with slimmer looking girls. I feel that because I have been big, I have closed myself off to having fun, relatiobships and lighting up the room (which I could before). I have seriously had enough of feeling this way...I like most of us trying to loose weight, I feel helpless and its a vicious circle...feel a bit down, eat, start, break diet, eat, start, break....Each time I go shopping I end up buying size 10/12 clothes, hoping one day I can get into them...I have an entire wardrobe of this size and have never been able to get into them....I refuse to give them away as they are clothes I'd wear now even though they have been bought 3/4 years ago....I want to get into them....
Two years ago I went to Cancun and lost tons of weight and I got down to a weight of 11.7 stones at 5ft 3"...
I vowed I will not go back up to my weight of 14 stones but I didnt stay at that weight for too long, shot right back up.... :O(
Even though that was not my goal weight at the time, I FELT FANTASTIC!!! Went away on holiday, feeling confident...thought I could pull any man I wanted too...Lol..
I don't know why but this time round it feels different, I feel that I have come along weigh emotionally and mentally, reading peoples inspirational stories for years has made me believe THIS IS POSSIBLE and I enough is enough, I want to get somewhere....I WANT TO SHIFT THIS WEIGHT and really have a determined WARRIOR SPIRIT and feel good about myself....I know that if I can get past loosing this weight and transforming my body image, not only will I feel good within me, I will show that world I love myself....hence portray this image, and when you portray this, people automatically sense you are content. I want to make this commitment this time round and take control of my life and really prove to myself that I can transform and live a healthier lifestyle, physically, mentally & emotionally...
I want 2011 to be my year and hope at the age of 30 to date & find love...
I'm 5ft 3" and currently weight 193lbs thats almost 14 stones....
My 1st miles stone is to stick to CD SS+ 100%, I am hoping to loose 5 stones and then move up the plan until I reach 120lbs. I hope I find some lovely friends along the way and hope you all out there who are in a similar position as me will loose and get down to there goal weight.
I've been procarastinating whether to do this diet for that last 5/6 years...and each time I start, I am good for the most 5 weeks and then I go back to my old ways of eating...I have said in the past, I want to look good for this holiday, that event, my brothers wedding, blah blah, but all the events have come and gone and here I am, STILL FAT, and feeling crap!!! :cry:
Honestly there have been days where I hate myself and looking in the mirror is really painful as I have this disgusted image which only I can see and no matter how hard I've tried to be positive, I can't...I find it hard to socialise as I have been fairly big since I've been a little girl and been around alot of discouraging people who have always said you have no will power and your never going to find a man being that size! (That includes my mum). I've had a few relationships but the men I have been with always run off and cheat on me with slimmer looking girls. I feel that because I have been big, I have closed myself off to having fun, relatiobships and lighting up the room (which I could before). I have seriously had enough of feeling this way...I like most of us trying to loose weight, I feel helpless and its a vicious circle...feel a bit down, eat, start, break diet, eat, start, break....Each time I go shopping I end up buying size 10/12 clothes, hoping one day I can get into them...I have an entire wardrobe of this size and have never been able to get into them....I refuse to give them away as they are clothes I'd wear now even though they have been bought 3/4 years ago....I want to get into them....
Two years ago I went to Cancun and lost tons of weight and I got down to a weight of 11.7 stones at 5ft 3"...
I vowed I will not go back up to my weight of 14 stones but I didnt stay at that weight for too long, shot right back up.... :O(
Even though that was not my goal weight at the time, I FELT FANTASTIC!!! Went away on holiday, feeling confident...thought I could pull any man I wanted too...Lol..
I don't know why but this time round it feels different, I feel that I have come along weigh emotionally and mentally, reading peoples inspirational stories for years has made me believe THIS IS POSSIBLE and I enough is enough, I want to get somewhere....I WANT TO SHIFT THIS WEIGHT and really have a determined WARRIOR SPIRIT and feel good about myself....I know that if I can get past loosing this weight and transforming my body image, not only will I feel good within me, I will show that world I love myself....hence portray this image, and when you portray this, people automatically sense you are content. I want to make this commitment this time round and take control of my life and really prove to myself that I can transform and live a healthier lifestyle, physically, mentally & emotionally...
I want 2011 to be my year and hope at the age of 30 to date & find love...
I'm 5ft 3" and currently weight 193lbs thats almost 14 stones....
My 1st miles stone is to stick to CD SS+ 100%, I am hoping to loose 5 stones and then move up the plan until I reach 120lbs. I hope I find some lovely friends along the way and hope you all out there who are in a similar position as me will loose and get down to there goal weight.
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