Any Singletons?

newlifenow · 1 October 2010

I'm 27 and single and Ive seriously wanted to meet someone for the past year or so. My weight has always been something thats held me back and Ive no idea how i look physically to the outside world. I'm so confident in every other area of my life and its so contradicting that this is a huge problem for me.
I know that someone should love you for who you are and not what you look like but i couldn't blame a man for not wanting to be with me at 14 stone and 5ft 5 high. I go on internet dates and i am soooo worried that im ten times bigger in reality than my photo.
My weight is something that is on my mind twenty four hours a day. Not one of my family or friends ever ever mentioned my weight or suggested a loose a bit etc its like the biggest taboo in the world. I am not big headed but i know im good looking and never had trouble meeting men but i certainly have trouble keeping them and i believe most of it is down to my weight.

I wonder why iv let this go on so long or have i been unsubconciously using my weight as a weapon to avoid a relationship and in turn getting hurt.

Can anyone relate? Am I mad?

missy3 · 1 October 2010

Your not mad

it is something that i think most of us on here have struggled with. My weight is something i've always been soooo self conscious about. I think the most important thing is being really happy with urself, we are always our own worst critics. It drives my bf insane wen i'm like i'm so fat in this top etc. when he probably didn't even notice / nor was he that bothered. I think the key thing is confidence.

batlo8 · 1 October 2010

Oh my god, it's like you are in my mind! You are definitely not mad, I too am 27 and single and I must say you're braver than me as I wouldn't even consider an Internet date in case they ran for the hills! I, like you know I am a beautiful girl, I dress well, do my hair nicely and look at my best. But that doesn't change the fact I'm fat and I know for a fact that deters many men. It's shallow but unfortunately true.

Obviously not all men, plenty of them like s bit of meat on thr bones but probably with our body hang ups we manage to put them off too cos we comr across as having no confidence! Vicious circle.

The way I see it, we are you, beautiful and succesful, we now need to tackle the one thing holding us back xxx

j-lo_00b · 1 October 2010

newlifenow said:
I'm 27 and single and Ive seriously wanted to meet someone for the past year or so. My weight has always been something thats held me back and Ive no idea how i look physically to the outside world. I'm so confident in every other area of my life and its so contradicting that this is a huge problem for me.
I know that someone should love you for who you are and not what you look like but i couldn't blame a man for not wanting to be with me at 14 stone and 5ft 5 high. I go on internet dates and i am soooo worried that im ten times bigger in reality than my photo.
My weight is something that is on my mind twenty four hours a day. Not one of my family or friends ever ever mentioned my weight or suggested a loose a bit etc its like the biggest taboo in the world. I am not big headed but i know im good looking and never had trouble meeting men but i certainly have trouble keeping them and i believe most of it is down to my weight.

I wonder why iv let this go on so long or have i been unsubconciously using my weight as a weapon to avoid a relationship and in turn getting hurt.

Can anyone relate? Am I mad?

Hey hun your not mad at all, Im only 21 but I feel exactly the same, its strange how we let these extra lb's dictate our whole life. Same as you I feel like im way bigger than I actually am and that no one is going to want to see my naked body.

This negative self image is something we have to adress though, I firmly believe ive driven men away because I whine moan and live and breathe my weight problems. Im a firm believer in the power of attraction and its true that if you dont love yourself, it is very hard to love somebody else and for them to love you back. Im not saying people with body issues are incapable of loving another but I do think to be at ease in a r/ship you have to love yourself first. Also partners are interested in others who are confident with their appearance and if you keep moanign about yourself (ike ive done so many times) they find you that less attractive.

So I say, lets learn to re-educate both our minds, bodies and souls and hopefully we will find that other person who loves us regardless of our faults

x x

Any Singletons?

newlifenow

Full Member

missy3

starving!

batlo8

Full Member

j-lo_00b

Success leads to success

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