I had this on an email and just thought I would share with you all.
'Twas the month after Christmas,
And all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
Not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled,
The chocolate I'd taste
At the holiday parties
Had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales
There arose such a number
That my blood pressure spiked!
(Oh, Lord, what a bummer!).
I remembered the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
And how I never said, "Oh, no thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And dug for my only elastic-waist skirt,
I said to myself as I saw my reflection,
"If you see any food, go the other direction!"
So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
Get rid of the fruit cake, the crackers, the chips.
Every last bit of food that I love must be banished
Until the additional pounds have all vanished.
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick;
My days will be filled with long celery sticks.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, in misery, and life is a bore,
But I guess this is what January is for.
Saw a cute dress on sale, but too fat to buy it :-(
Happy New Year to all,
And to all a good diet!
Life is Good!
'Twas the month after Christmas,
And all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
Not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled,
The chocolate I'd taste
At the holiday parties
Had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales
There arose such a number
That my blood pressure spiked!
(Oh, Lord, what a bummer!).
I remembered the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
And how I never said, "Oh, no thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And dug for my only elastic-waist skirt,
I said to myself as I saw my reflection,
"If you see any food, go the other direction!"
So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
Get rid of the fruit cake, the crackers, the chips.
Every last bit of food that I love must be banished
Until the additional pounds have all vanished.
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick;
My days will be filled with long celery sticks.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, in misery, and life is a bore,
But I guess this is what January is for.
Saw a cute dress on sale, but too fat to buy it :-(
Happy New Year to all,
And to all a good diet!
Life is Good!
